Are you holding the other person responsible for your feelings of safety

Are you holding the other person responsible for your feelings of safety?

Are you holding the other person responsible for your feelings of safety

These last months I feel like I’ve been going through an inner change and life has felt hard. Given to the understanding that I have, that life is never really hard but it’s always our own perception that can make things look like it is, this is the beauty I’ve seen through it.

Sometimes when we grow we go through something that will allow us to see beyond our current ways of seeing life. See more how things truly are. See more beauty and see more love.

What I’ve come to see these last months is that holding something outside of ourselves responsible for our feelings of safety is always made out of false beliefs.

The other person, our partner cannot be the source of our safety. If we innocently make them as an image of that we’ll at some point be proven wrong.

The only place where we can find fulfillment —ever — is when we go within. When we go within we are taken care of.

There’s a power greater than ourselves that guides us.

When we place our feelings of safety on the other person our love can never be complete. It becomes conditional. As long as the other person gives us what we believe that we need we love them and feel safe.

However that’s not love. Love can never be conditional, but it’s always unconditional.

If we hold something outside of ourselves responsible for our feelings of safety, the feeling will come and go depending on our level of state of mind. Sometimes our partner is here to support us, and other times they are not. That’s human and perfect as it is.

The only place where we can truly find that feeling of safety is when we go within. Trusting that power greater than ourselves and that we will always be taken care of no matter what.

Trusting that when things feel hard that there’s something beautiful that will come out of it all.

Trusting that when we don’t receive what we want, there’s something even better for us when we hold onto our faith.

The only thing that can truly offer us any real safety is going within and connecting with that power we all have within us.

And when we do this we are always accompanied with this feeling of peacefulness. When we do this things in our outside circumstances seem to take a new direction. A more favorable one.

When we do this our relationships can become this beautiful expression of the love we’re connected with within us.

When we stop holding our outside circumstances, and the other person, responsible for our feelings of safety, and we go within, we find so much beauty within us that we will effortlessly go forward in life.

We find so much peace and love that it cannot but help to provide us the most beautiful relationships we are here to experience.

When we go within we find love, we find peace and beauty. And that’s the only place where we can find these feelings. Yet, when we do this our outside circumstances, the other person and our relationships, cannot help but to turn into a more beautiful expression of life.

That’s the oneness of life. Our inner world creating our outer world.

That’s what we can hold responsible for our feelings of safety and that’s where unconditional love is also always found.

With love,
Heidi

Heidi Paavilainen

Sharing an understanding that allows us to connect more with that deeper part within us, so that we can find our own answers from within, find that greater sense of wellbeing and have relationships that feel good. Receive my weekly emails about love and wellbeing or learn more about my downloadable audios and one-on-one coaching program here.

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